Illustrations by Alix Ayoub.

Food Truck Farce

Sometimes the offhand, half-considered ideas get the biggest response. For example, Editor-in-Chief Travis Hoewischer posted a prompt to his Facebook page asking for people’s best fictitious food truck names, and within a day the post received more than 300 hilarious, ridiculous, and absurd replies. As part of an issue inspired by the common ground shared by food and drink and music, we couldn’t help but offer some of the best that fit that theme.

Beets Don’t Kale My Vibe 


Justin McIntosh

Kendrick Lamar, the hottest rapper in the game, can’t wait to unleash his socially conscious saladmobile on the masses.

Oreo Speedwagon


B.J. Davis

Serving up nostalgic rock along with its nostalgic cookies. If you track down the food truck at a state fair, there’s a chance the actual band will serenade you while you twist, dunk, and eat.



Jordan Hoewischer

We laughed really hard at this one every time we came across it, but we really have no idea what it would offer. A pita called Wrap of My Madness, served with quinoa and juice perhaps?

ZZ Tapas


Philip Emilio Palma

Small plates from chefs with big beards, featuring dishes like La Grange Free-range Chicken, Sharp-Dressed Ham Sandwich, Gimme All Your Lasagna, and Tube Steak Boogie.

Men at Wok


Holly Snowden

Asian fusion from Down Under. This truck will take you in and make you breakfast. It also features vegemite sandwiches on bread from a man from Brussels. This cuisine is very confusing. At least there aren’t any Bloomin’ Onions.

Meat Virginia


Adrian Spillman

It’s more of a Train than a truck. It will be really popular for a little while, but in retrospect people will wonder how anyone enjoyed it all.